The
marvelous title of Les Murray’s new collection, Waiting for the Past (Farrar, Straus and Giroux, 2016), is taken
from the opening stanzas of “Growth,” one of many rooted in memories of Murray’s
childhood in New South Wales:
“One
who’d been my friendly Gran
was
now mostly barred from me,
accomplishing
her hard death
on
that strange farm miles away.
“My
mother was nursing her
so
we couldn’t be at home.
Dad
had to stay out there, milking,
appearing
sometimes, with his people,
all
waiting for the past.”
Murray’s
meaning is double. His father, decades earlier (Murray was born in 1938), waits
for the grandmother’s death to make her a part of the “past,” a memory. The
dead are with us, but alien. They have entered another realm. Secondly, the poet
plumbs his memories and waits for the past to appear, like a photographic image
in a tray of developer. We learn the textures of our memory, the gaps and vivid
scenes, the effortlessly remembered and involuntarily forgotten. Memory is an
endlessly edited palimpsest, and yet we fancy it permanent. In Speak, Memory, Nabokov remembers his
family’s estate in Russia: “I see again my schoolroom in Vyra, the blue roses
of the wallpaper, the open window . . . . Everything is as it should be,
nothing will ever change, nobody will ever die.”
The
reality is sad in a different way, as Eric Ormsby reminds us in “Childhood House" (Coastlines, 1992):
“I
see that this isn’t so, that
Memory
decays like the rest, is unstable in its essence,
Flits,
occludes, is variable, sidesteps, bleeds away, eludes
All
recovery; worse, is not what it seemed once, alters
Unfairly,
is not the intact garden we remember, but
Instead,
speeds away from us backwards terrifically
Until
when we pause to touch that sun-remembered
Wall,
the stones are friable, crack and sift down,
And
we could cry at the fierceness of that velocity
If
our astonished eyes had time.”
1 comment:
Wonderful contrast. Nabokov's is the rarity, a Platonic Ideal, and Ormsby's, however beautifully put, the banal reality. For most of us, "waiting for the past" has but one meaning.
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