Readers in
the digital age have grown accustomed to a new and unexpected understanding of
friendship. Physical proximity is no longer required. What we might call proximity
of sensibility is. Some of the people whose company I value most I don’t ever expect
to meet in person. They are smart and well-read. They wield a nicely ironic
sense of wit. They have paid attention and know things. They can tell a story
concisely. They have much in common with gifted conversationalists. They are
not egomaniacs. Of course, such a novel friendship model has a well-established
literary precursor: the lifelong relationships we build with writers, many of
whom died long ago.
The passage
at the top is from the prologue Jorge Luis Borges wrote to a Spanish-language
edition of Charles and Mary Lamb’s Tales
of Shakespeare in 1966. Borges continues: “They [Montaigne, Browne, et al.] are doubtless admirable but we
can’t admire them, as often happens between friends; what is essential is to
love them.” This is not a sentiment endorsed by academics and other
sophisticates, but non-aligned amateur readers will get it. We love Evelyn Waugh. We love A.J. Liebling. Make your own list. Admire is too anemic a verb. Such
relationships transcend mere scholarly interest, just as a friendship
transcends mere acquaintance or our dealings with the guy at the convenience store who sells
cigarettes and milk. More Borges on Lamb and his sister:
“They whiled
away their days with tranquil passions: exercises of letters, the friendship of
Coleridge and Hazlitt, the arbitrary and labyrinthine literary style of the
seventeenth century, the acquisition of venerable folios and antique porcelain.
Also whist: he delighted in the rigor of its rules and hated those idle persons
who played just to play. He desired a heaven that would not exclude the different
flavors of wine, or kinds of birds, the festive light of candelabra, friendly
and ironic jokes. He was incapable of resisting, in conversation, the most
atrocious puns.”
[See Borges on Shakespeare, ed. Grace
Tiffany, Arizona Center for Medieval and Renaissance Studies, 2018.]
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