'How Very Like a Red, Red Rose'

The stuff starts as white powder at the bottom of a one-gallon plastic jug. Add lukewarm water to the line, shake vigorously. Add a thoughtfully included “flavor packet” – lemon-lime, my favorite – to make it “palatable.” Chill. Drink eight ounces every fifteen minutes until the jug is empty. The label calls it “Gavilyte-G Solution 4000ML.” Catchy. Included on the list of possible side effects:

“Very bad headache. Throwing up blood or throw up that looks like coffee grounds. Black, tarry [!], or bloody stools. Bleeding from rectum or rectal pain. This drug may cause you to be dehydrated or have electrolyte problems. Rarely, this may be severe or deadly.”

 

And I volunteered for this. The label says, “No REFILLS.” Barbara Loots in “Colonoscopy: A Love Poem” (Windshift, Kelsay Books, 2018) finds something to celebrate in this most humbling of medical procedures. With apologies to Robert Burns:

 

“My love is like a red, red rose.

I know because I’ve seen

the photographs inside of him

projected on a screen:

 

“the petal-like appearance of

his proximal transverse,

his mid-ascending colon

like a rose’s opening purse,

 

“appendiceal orifice,

a bud not yet unfurled —

Oh, what a pleasing garden is

my true love’s inner world!

 

“How very like a red, red rose

his clean and healthy gut.

I love my laddie all the more

since looking up his butt.”